You are gay if ...

You have heard the saying ... if it walks like a duck, squawks like a duck it is a duck.

Hm ... it is largely true with the typical entertainment in our gay world. If you are lost with most of what is about to follow, you need a gay life - badly.

You have not lived as a fulfilled gay man unless you have watched some of the following (in no particular order) at least 10 times:

1. Desperate Housewives
2. Sex and the City (including the movie)
4. Those cheesy Latino soaps that had masses glued to their television sets across much of Africa in the early 2000s.
5. Queer Eye for the Straight Man
6. America's Next Top Model
7. Are You Being Served?


8. Queer as Folk (The British and/or American version)
9. Six Feet Under
10. RuPaul's Drag Race
11. Will and Grace
12. Dynasty (yes, this goes back a while, if only because the repeats are rather rare)
13. Law and Order SVU (plus the other related gritty detective derivatives)
14. Oz
15. Ugly Betty
16. Dawson's Creek
17. Noah's Ark (including the movie)

And you know nothing about gay music if you don't know at least some of the lyrics to any of the following gay songs (again in no particular order):

1. I will survive - Gloria Gaynor
2. YMCA - Village People
3. I Am What I Am - From the Broadway Musical La Cage aux Folles
4. I am Coming Out - Diana Ross
5. Dancing Queen - ABBA
6. I am every woman - Chaka Khan
7. I've Never Been to Me - Various, including Olivia Newton John
8. Believe - Cher
9. It's raining men - Anon
10. Enough is enough (No more tears) - Donna Summer & Barbra Streisand
11. I want (to deserve you) - Better Midler
12. Your Secret Love - Luther Vandross

And of course you are a gay man when/if you love music by George Michael, Barbara Streisand, Patti La Belle, Madonna, Elton John, Maxwell, Sister Sledge, Donna Summer, Beyonce, ABBA, Diana Ross, Cher, Kylie Minogue, Janette Jackson, Brenda Fassie (RIP), Michael Learns to Rock, The Spice girls, Bette Midler, Luther Vandross

Your life is incomplete if you have not yet seen any of the following iconic gay movies (meaning movies that gay men love to love):

1. The Devil Wears Prada
2. Brokeback Mountain
3. Maurice
4. Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert (re-made as To Wong Foo in the US)
5. My Beautiful Laundrette
6. Out of Africa
7. Parting Glances
8. The Birdcage
9. Shaka Zulu - those ripped bodies ... ooh la, la, la
10. Armistad - same reason as Shaka Zulu
11. Philadelphia
12. Victor Victoria
13. Gods and Monsters
14. And the Band Played On
15. Roots
16. Deliver us from Eva
17. Chicago
18. Shakespeare in Love
19. Moulin Rouge
20. Mame

And you are a gay man if you like/love the following actors/actresses:

Barbra Streisand, Taye Diggs, LL Cool J, Tyrese Gibson, Bette Midler, Joan Crawford, Bette Davis, Terrell Carter, Patti Duke, Rupert Everett, Dolly Parton, Doris Day, Morris Chestnut, Audrey Hepburn, Judy Garland

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